I'm sorry

Feeling quite bad recently as i am too obsess with drums... e.g. Training my finger speed for 2 hours last monday... jamming in ajband room for 1.5 hour...
I confess this sin to lord everyday since last last week but i'm still not disciplined enuf... so i have decided to post it so i will be reminded now and then...
Then i had a dream last night... I shall call it a reminder... God raised his voice and reminded me to seek him first... cast away my idol... i cried and poured out everything... praying for forgiveness... It was a bad dream and it stayed in my head for so long... till now...
Then during lecture Elim Jie sms the youths about God's presence... so strong! It is a confirmation from God i think... I really felt i am not holy enuf to be in his presence. But i know this is a time for me to grow strong spritually...
Then...today my schoolmates were sitting there criticizing christians... Oh... i really donno what to do... But i will leave it to God to judge them... felt like i was crucified... Bearing e cross is tough... i felt very unesay at first but God calmed me down...
I donno if i should say this... It is not right to judge anyone but now i jus stating the fact and not judging... I have this fren (non believer) whom i felt very uneasy being with... always pulling a long face... and always judging ppl around... especially me... always negative comments... i am ok with it because i am seldom affected... but... i worry cuz i can always sense... discouragement and many other bad satanic feelings... nevermind... i will jus pray for this fren to become more optimistic one day and stop condemning christians... Bless u.