Thinking about God, thinking of God, thinking for God.

I have realise the real Passion in me.

Learning.

There is nothing as exciting as being a noob. I love it.. and when i am no longer a noob, i find other situations other skills where i can be a noob again. And it repeats itself.

My left hand for example.. it was a chore controlling it.. now it is not hard to do whatever my right hand can do.. i am no longer interested in it anymore... and maybe play some pranks that i am a left hander. Lol! Handedness is no longer an issue. Maybe the issue is.. where should i hold my traditional grip?

I even tried to make myself left master eye.. almost there Lol! and sight reading, improvising, ear trainings, I have to admit i am very noob at these and i love it.

This can't go on if i were to be so fast changing in the things i do.

So did God put a desire in me for all these or did i create my own desires? You will not desire the things i desire, and definitely this has got a lot to do with your surroundings, and eventually the things you desire will determine what you do.

Why a philosopher don't do carpenter work, why Da vinci don't work as a main chef in a well known restaurant? We can actually do anything we want to do.. but we don't do it because it is not what we desire.

God created this desire in us or is this desire a part of our choice?

I would say God created this desire.
When we don't like something.. it is rather absolute.. but when we like something.. we sometimes doubt our extent of liking. If the things we do not like can be so definite( at least for me) then it is these things that are "not" that defines what i like.. and it is absolute. Eventually, i am born with it, circumstances might change it, and God creates circumstances.

But if it is this simple that "the things i like to do defines what i will be doing" then... y is there still uncertainty in what we will be doing most of our time(life)? Is it money? Competition? Or there is no such thing as taking a hobby as a job. No one says that.. but actually almost everyone thinks this way. I am naive, i would seem.. but i am not. I am proposing a change. There are trends that occur because people long for the success of the rich. Simple - money defines what we do now. In ideal situations with equal distribution of wealth and appreciation for effort.. our desires will define what we do.. Slackers will slack happily and labourers will labour happily.

So what are you trying to say.

I hate the idea of money. Especially the idea that i cannot live without money. Hate it to the deepest CORE!

Misunderstanding: Then give me your money Jiaxing..

I cannot live without money.. it is a truth. I am so trapped.. I hate it so much and i cannot let it go. Ultimate irritating disgusting revolting! Now imagine.. you are in a world where everything you can eat is glue.. you hate to eat glue.. but thats the only thing you can eat, people will be fighting over glue.. and you don't want to eat gule but you have to eat... glue.

Confirm there will be glue lovers storing glue in their store room in this situation.. and you are like.. ?! What the heck? You eat a ton of glue a day is it? Y do you want more than what you need?
Throw away the glue! Lets start having chef and farmers.