O o..

I will be having audition next Monday.

Seeking for graded tuned percussion ABRSM book 4.

Fine line between drums and mallets.

To prepare mentally, if i don't get in, I will eat a bar of ice cream.

And perhaps there will be another route planned for me, I can teach for good.

If i get in, i will have to spend much time on tuned percussion.

I will be a more educated percussionist that teach drums.

I had a dream written down when i was 19 years old. And God told me to give him the glory.

To think of it, I am really happy i had no talent, no former music education, no certificate, no guided training for percussion, don't play mallets and i am 23 this year.

I am a sure fail case for audition, but Heidi showed me grace and did allowed me to participate in this audition.

Ms Hedi said:

"You got in last year because there were no one better than you!"

Thats how i got in last year. (In fact there were only 2 qualified percussionist and i am one of them LOL)

Competition is bad this year.

I never felt the need to fast. I never worried sick for a single day in my school life. I always want to be near the top.

Now i want to do the things i know i am not good at but i need to do it. I will never do such a thing in my life.. but now, and i want to do it really really well.

I can visualise days of sight reading, scales and arpeggios on the mallets, history texts, music essays, presentations. I am certainly not good in any of these.

Elim once said i might not like the kind of education in music school... at least not the history texts. It had a big impact on me. I know it is not true, but then she was so certain i am afraid it is true. I respect her as a cell leader and i never heard it is a good or bad thing that i did the choices in my life now, but there were many times when she said no matter what bad choices we make, God will use it for a purpose. So certainly i made a bad choice to quit school. Well, i am grown up enough to discard the need for affirmation.

The worst thing that can happen now is.. to lose my arm.

God, I love you and i trust you have written a Cool plan in my life. Just let them happen. And teach me to be happy in all these things that are about to happen.